Azog the Defiler

Why Azog the Defiler...

 isn't such a bad guy after all! 

0. Default: He loves to HATE dwarves! 


Dwarves are supposed to be hated & killed! It is known!


0.1 Extra credit: Living proof that Azog is so loving is his son Bolg! Bolg loves to kill dwarves too! 
 
Джуджета...
Джуджетааа
Всичките джуджета на Mезета!

That makes Thranduil smile on the inside & bitchface on the outside! :3


Having such an affectionate father, Bolg loves many other things:


I think it's elf-explanatory that he LOVES Tauriel - the redhead she-elf! A chip off the old block...

 
Yeah...sorry about that Legolas!

 
But don't worry, Leggy! He loves You too! From BEHIND...


Very very much! To bits & pieces...

Not to mention Bolg is such a gentleman...orc... Gentleorc! 


He makes his Papa so proud! 


Back to AZOG though! 

Or else...

1. Azog loves his white warg bitch  - Zrii!

 ok... maybe a bit TOO MUCH! 


2. He also loves Pussycats! 

...and all kinds of pussy, actually! Especially Redheads... Like father like son :3


3. He loves POETRY! 

...although poetry doesn't love him back...

PS:At least not the way Poetry ADORES Thranduil...


4. Speak of the Devil ahem...I mean King! Azog loves my dear Elvenking Thranduil!
  

...D...DEEPLY! 

& mainly from behind... But love will be love!

He even loves YOU for fuck's sake! 


I mean the Hell...who else would be BRAVE enough to do that? 

Speaking of bravery he is simply as brave as they can get!


 Just ask Thranduil...  

Now tell him you LOVE him back and he'll be like:


S-Senpai noticed me!

OR ELSE!!!


 He'll feel blue...



& You'll feel DEAD!


Bitch!

TOP Reasons why Azog makes me WET:

0. Is for dat D - fault :3

1. Even as a hardcore warrior he knows the motion of the ocean can have gentle sways...
 

2. He has a freaking THRONE & he looks damn powerful sitting on it:


I mean just look at that piece of ass:


He might as well warm the Throne of HELL!



Makes me just wanna sit on top of that myself & play his Game of Thrones:


Ahem...Like so!


3. Not to mention but still mentioning he is not just show! Azog has a whole fucking army to go with that badass Throne of his:

He sure knows how to dominate... :3 & I'd make him my lord Cummander!

He hates Thorin Oakenshild & all matter of dwarves! 

That makes me & Thranduil both veery very horny...

He looks dropdead HOT as a woman too... I mean like Viking shieldmaiden hot!

& bitch please? Thorny-lace Battle Ready Armour? My inner lesbian is tingling...

As a matter of fuck Azog can look HOT in anything, with everything, anytime, anyway!

BEHOLD! 
 
To sum up Azog is one scorchingly sexy elfmotherfucker who knows where he stands!

Or lies down...

& I am by far not the only poor horny bitch that thinks so:

 *gulp* Here we go again...
*sigh* *unzip...*
*schlicking in the distance*

An Azog & Thranduil LOVESTORY
The fucking short version! 
Thrandy POV:

First I was like:

But then we were like:

And then I was like:

But then He was like:

So then I went like:


& in the end our son is like:

Azog & his beloved Moonbitch... I mean Moon Witch wife! 

              
               
                
                     Morgayne!
...

Azog enters the dance battle like a BOSS & wins this shit for Thranduil (who would have otherwise won anyway)